For those of you from my generation – and a rocking generation we are! I do hope this Fleetwood Mac song played in your head while you read this title.
Yes, there are so many people out there still looking out for love, big big love.
This article was prompted by my cousins’ search for a groom for her daughter. A smart, pretty child!
It’s the age-old question / statement singles dread at any wedding –
“So, you’re next !!”
Or
“When are you giving us the big news?”
I remember a few decades ago when my sister got married, I was asked this question a gazillion times. At one point I turned around and told an overzealous Aunty “You find me the boy aunty – I am ready!”
Cut to present day. Blessed are those parents whose progeny find their own mate. However, this situation still bothers us. Parents are quite liberal. Still there is that one off chance where they feel their child may need that required nudge. Perhaps that much needed steering towards the right road.
And once said match is found, all those questions will the pieces fit .
Very often it’s just the wedding that has focus, not the marriage, the relationship. It’s all too true when the honeymoon is really over and day to day mundane life takes over. You do marry the entire family. All this should indeed be taken into account before saying yes.
I have heard that Gujrati’s have the tradition of the bride & groom to be going to their prospective in – laws house to see the rehen-sehen. In English to actually see how the other side lives. For sure you can’t keep up that pretty face and serve in your good china for a month!
A friend once told me when you’re sure you want to marry someone go and visit him/ her at 3 am – If you love that face then your set for life ! I know he did and is still very much in love with his wife.
A close friend shared with me how the matchmaking market ( Ouch!!) really is.
A very handsome actor from the South beckons us to try a certain elite service. I’ll bet little does this dashing bloke know their modus operandi
They come and collect a fee of about one lakh INR and then they show you (gasp!) good, eligible boys or girls. Then when you wish to proceed further said prospects are not interested. I cannot think of anything more demeaning or undervaluing than that!
Scenario 2: A slew of websites assuring easy matches and matrimonial bliss (bliss- hmmmphhh) .I’ve heard these sites have the same names and profiles rehashed and represented on all these portals.
Sigh and then we have this self-obsessed “gentle”man .Check out his list of asks. I cannot roll my eyes any farther back reading this. I am aghast. I would rather have any child of mine remain single than have to deal with that!
When it comes to Inputs & assistance our community GurgaonMoms never fails!
So, I made a post to really try and see what options are out there. Sharing them ( and some others) here in the hope it brightens and eases someone’s way to finding their partner (or their child’s)
If at the end of the day someone can say “She’s his lobster” it will be so fulfilling.
Here’s some of what I discovered:
- Footloose no more
- BVowed (elaborating more below)
- Andwemet
- Woo – a dating app
- The good old pandit at the temple is still going strong
- Tinder
- Bumble
- Coffee and bagel
- Especially for second timers – secondshaadi.com
- Interfaith marriages exclusively: nonreligiousmatrimony.com
- Community Matrimony which claims to have someone from each and every community . However at a closer glance I found it super weird that there is no Sindhi listed as a community ! However there is a dhobi matrimony section !Phew our washer men are sorted
- Truly madly
- Matchfinder.com – said to be very economical !
- I have heard there is a cruise nearabouts America where my brethren gather – all singles mind you . They then get away and sea( see- sorry could not resist that pun ) what the future holds. I think it’s a great innovative idea.
BVowed is one such portal which was started by a woman ( yes of course she’s married!) She found that a lot of people she knew found this process stressful.
So in the words of Ruchira Gupta the founder
“I decided to start a venture that makes the journey of finding a life partner as happy as the ‘happily ever after”
She goes on to say :
“If someone wants to use a contemporary service for finding their life partner, there aren’t choices that cater to matrimony exclusively.
Going through a service that also caters to dating can lead to many an awkward conversation, when people start talking with different objectives to start with. This is what I heard from many single women I spoke with while doing the research before actually launching BVowed.
Google will show you many more sites than what I have listed above. Good Luck , hang in there and let your child be unruffled whilst making this choice please.
Disclaimer: The comments in this article are to be taken with a pinch of salt, some tadka and mirch masala ( tempering and spice). None of the recommendations here have been personally utilised. They are a mere guidance on this journey
