Image Source: quickmeme

There are times in our lives when we make a decision and realize later that it was a bad one. So just like that, I enrolled myself in a gym. I am not a fitness freak. There are times when I binge eat, there are times when I don’t binge eat. But I can’t consume myself in heavy-duty exercises. I am the kind of person who likes to take a book and sit in a cozy corner of a room all day! But I felt my energy levels dropping and decided to start working out. So very enthusiastically, I paid my membership fee. On the first day, my husband (who sadly is a fitness freak) and I, went to the gym together. It was a pleasant autumn day and I was already feeling like Katrina Kaif (even before I stepped in). So I was introduced to a gym instructor, a pleasant guy. I was relieved as he kept saying that we will start slow and go steady. He told me to get on the treadmill and he moved on to help the others. I put on my ear-pods and jumped on the treadmill as if there was no tomorrow. Within seconds I felt sweat trickle between my breasts. My heartbeat started increasing and I started panting. I stopped the treadmill and ran to a corner table to grab some tissues.

Gif Source: Tenor

I put the tissues under my tee-shirt and started rubbing them on my chest while screaming “hai – hai – kahan phas gayi”. I realized then, that I was standing in front of my husband who was on the treadmill too but looking at me in horror. I never realized earlier that his eyes could get so big. I went closer to him, with my hand still inside, trying to soak in all the rivers of sweat flowing between my breasts. I kept saying “hai – hai” loudly. He looked so scared then, his eyes couldn’t get any wider. He just stopped the treadmill and went out. After about 30 seconds I saw him from the window – running towards the parking lot – he had fled. Just then I saw my trainer looking at me from a distance. Now I knew he will come for me so I quickly ran to the ladies’ room. It was a beautifully done-up space that had comfortable seating – sprawling bathrooms, steam sauna, changing rooms. I sat there for like 20 minutes and finally sneaked out like a thief and went back home. I met my extremely shocked husband at home. We had an argument where he kept telling me that I can’t scream ‘hai – hai’ in public and I kept telling him it was not in my control. I told him that I can’t subject my body to extreme torture and he replied that I was on the treadmill for 40 seconds. Anyways, after about an hour my trainer called and I told him that my experience was too bad. He said let’s do this again tomorrow. I didn’t go for like 10 days. The trainer called again asking why I am not coming and my reply was – ladies problem (I didn’t have any problem). He called again after a week and I decided to go. We started slow and it was not as bad as my first day. I continued with them for like 3 – 4 months. But I realized that my heart will always be happy with strolls in the park. So I bid them a happy goodbye. We all need to do some physical activity. But it does not mean you have to be hard on yourself. Some find solace in running, some in the gym, some find it in playing a sport but I found mine in walks!! Fitness is a strong part of self-care but you need to find your path as I found mine.